


the kinnie kingdom SMP was a great (terrible) idea

by Multifandom_Otaku



Series: kinnie kingdom oneshots????? more likely than you'd think. [1]
Category: Kinnie Kingdom, Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - After College/University, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Streamers, Alternate Universe - We are Minecraft Youtubers, And it's chronic, Cussing, Everyone Is Gay, Foxie doesn't have minecraft, Foxie has literally no care in the world, Gen, Homestuck References, Inside jokes, Kinnie Kingdom SMP AU, Kinnies, Merlot gets lost a lot, Merlot has dumb bitch energy, Merlot is a Tea Addict, Merlot named herself after her favorite bath and bodyworks scent., Minecraft, Nix and Foxie haven't watched Dream SMP, Rated T for beeping Language, Real People are Used, Real people, Tea, Using Usernames, We have all been diagnosed with dumbass, all of us, and so the Kinnie Kingdom SMP au was born., but she does have KH, chaotic bastards, cursing, flxtlined and blxckmailed are emo, flxtlined has a duck skin, flxtlined is a dirk kinnie, flxtlined is wrong and thinks its mahogany teakwood, homestuck kinnie, it's obviously black cherry merlot, me and a few mutuals decided to think about what we would do as mcyts, mostly a chatfic, tea addiction, there is a best b&b scent war between merlot and flxtlined
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:48:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27045274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multifandom_Otaku/pseuds/Multifandom_Otaku
Summary: "what the fuck is up kinnies," foxie said as soon as she joined the TeamSpeak call, and you can hear Simple and Clean playing in the background."the ceiling" Hidden giggled."pain" rand said in the most deadpan way possible."whERe tHE FuCK am I RIgHT nOw hELp""mer, are you okay""no i'm so fucking lost."flxt cackled so fucking loudly into their mic. merlot was in fact, lost as all fuck right now, just stuck in the middle of an extreme hills biome."shUt uP,,,,,,,,"
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), platonic - Relationship
Series: kinnie kingdom oneshots????? more likely than you'd think. [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1979675
Comments: 5
Kudos: 3





	the kinnie kingdom SMP was a great (terrible) idea

**Author's Note:**

> Kinnie Kingdom SMP au is a go.

merlot was the first to be on the call. of course, she expected that to be the case. she liked to be on time, y'know. she was still waiting for her copy of Minecraft to boot up. actually, she was an hour early, but no one needs to know that. being that early was just kinda her thing, because either she's super early or she's gonna forget about it.

but hey, some of her friends decided to join the call early too. by like, 15 minutes. it was normal sitting in silence for an hour waiting for a call to start up. or maybe that was just her? it was probably just her.

anyways, her friends jumped into the call one by one. the first person to arrive was Hidden. Hidden was the person who owned the server. while merlot didn't know them personally, they were pretty cool.

"dude, how long have you been in call?" Hidden asked. 

"i don't fuckin know. an hour maybe?" 

"Damn early bird gets the fucking worm am i right."

"No my minecraft still hasn't booted up because i'm using the shittiest pc known to mankind." she mourned. the loading screen still at 70% or some shit like that.

"oh rip." 

the second one to jump in jumped in like, exactly a minute early. "yo kinnies," rand (which was short for ransom), or going by their username, blxckmail. 

"ah, yes, our resident cryptid has arrived." mer said, grinning a bit. "we just have to wait for everyone else. might wanna get some snacks and a drink, cause i can already tell you that most of these fuckers are gonna be really fucking late."

ransom and hidden both laughed and merlot checked her Minecraft yet again. 80%. 

there was a small automated voice, alerting them that someone had joined the call. 

"hey everyone!" Aster chimed in, a chipper tone to their voice. "how're y'alls doing today?"

"pretty good i guess." merlot said and checked on her Minecraft yet again. 82%. "god this thing takes way too much time to boot up."

Aster giggled. "you sure it's not because you have 30 tabs open per window?"

"oh." merlot checked and sure enough, she had way too many tabs open.

"that's what i thought."

"It's Britney, bitch." there were small giggles, and froggychair's little icon popped up in the call. 

"damn, we didn't even get the notice that you joined." aster said and grinned. they probably did, but did hear it.

merlot checked on her Minecraft again to find that it was fully loaded. "LET'S GO!!"

"it loaded up?" Hidden asked, a humorous tone to her voice.

"hells to the yeah!" merlot cheered and pulled it up into full view. she was excited af. 

mer prepared to take a celebratory sip of tea and was pretty disappointed when she found that there wasn't any tea left. "aaand my tea ran out."

"rip" 

"oh no."

"f in the chat." 

merlot rolled her eyes and grabbed her third tea of the day from the pack of twelve it had come in. "Idiots."

"When'll we start streaming?" aster asked, and seemed to be clicking on something. probably typing away on a server or something.

"When flatty and the other kids get here," Hidden answered, "So it's gonna be a while."

"fair."

And it was a while. Merlot had managed to get the server list to load up, go over her building plans for her house, her shop, and her mine before Ambassador strolled into the call, flxtty still nowhere to be seen, about 10 minutes late.

"Wassup folks."

"Nothing much, just waiting for dirk to get here." Hidden commented, and merl blanked out for a few seconds before remembering that that's what flxtty's preferred name was. and yeah, maybe he's a dirk kinnie what about it.

"Hidden dm him or something i'm borrrrrred." ransom complained, and merlot started wheezing, and then started cackling like she was a dying hyena.

"Dream irl???????" rand asked jokingly, knowing that it would get even more of a reaction out of their friend. 

"Ed from the lion king???? is that you???????" Ambassador asked, causing merlot's lung to collapse even more, if possible.

but no, merlot just laughed like that. she laughed weirdly, for sure, but that's because her lungs expelled all the air it could in one huff before forcing the rest out in slightly pained screeching.

"You good?" hidden asked as she slowly wound down from laughing.

"No, maybe, give me, like, five seconds." merlot wheezed a few times more before completely calming down. "Ok, i'm good."

"good, because you almost blew my ears out when i joined." flxtlined complained, completely out of the blue. He was just so suddenly there. 

"jESus christ dirk," ransom said, voice a little higher than it prolly should have been. "when did you join?"

"when merlot was trying to make me bleed out by my ears." they paused and then continued their answer. "That being said, about 20 seconds ago."

"who else are we waiting for?" 

"foxie, but she doesn't have mc so she can join whenever the fuck she wants." Hidden said and started up the server for the first time. 

"Fucking finally!"

"Yeah!"

"*unintelligible squealing*"

"YAS"

Everyone expressed varying levels of excitement and logged onto the server. 

"i am so fucking jittery," merlot said, and you could tell just from the pitch of her voice that she could run around and scream her lungs out at any moment now.

everyone logged on at about the same time and immediately grinned. This was gonna be awesome. they all landed in about the same place in the middle large, mostly flat, grassy expanse. "Plains biome it is then, i guess." rand said, a grin quite obvious in his voice. 

"This looks like a nice starter biome." froggychair chirped, his gamer tag bobbing up and down as he jumped around. they were all kind of hesitant.

Ambassador's character turned around slowly in a 360 before looking at Hidden. "What difficulty are we set on? i will never come back if we're on hard." 

"No, no, don't worry you noobs it's not on hard. We're on easy right now." Hidden teased, but her tone quickly turned to a more serious tone. "When y'alls think you're ready we can graduate to normal."

"Alright!" merlot chirped. that would be easy peasy. she giggled at her own accidental joke. this was gonna be fun.

\--------------------

Spoiler alert, it wasn't.

"what the fuck is up kinnies," foxie said as soon as she joined the TeamSpeak call, and you can hear Simple and Clean playing in the background. of course, that was normal. however, foxie just joined to a lot of distressed yelling, laughing, and outright, unholy screeching. everyone slightly calmed down after foxie joined. didn't mean that the damage wasn't already done and foxie felt like her ears were bleeding.

"the ceiling" 

"pain" rand said in the most deadpan way possible.

"whERe tHE FuCK am I RIgHT nOw hELp" 

"mer, are you okay" 

"no i'm so fucking lost."

flxtty cackled so fucking loudly into their mic. merlot was in fact, lost as all fuck right now, just stuck in the middle of an extreme hills biome.

"shUt uP,,,,,,,," merlot had split off from the group only a few seconds ago and now she was stranded on top of an extreme hills biome and she had no idea where everyone else was. "guyyyyssssssss help me out herrrrrreeeeeeeeeeee"

"you're on your own you know we all have a terrible sense of direction as well!" ambassador chuckled, and they all laughed while merlot whined at them to help her.

"what the fuck did i just get myself into." ven sighed and pinched the bridge of their nose. this was gonna be a wild ride, wasn't it. she looked back up at her screen and put her headset back on. they may be dumbasses, but they were her friends. may as well be dumbasses with them.

**Author's Note:**

> alright, most of this is word vomit, but yeah. all characters and people used were used with their permission.


End file.
